There are many words I would prefer my children not use (even though they’ve heard a few of them at home!). However, there are three words I hope I never hear them say - "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda!" (Okay, technically those aren’t words, but I’m sure you get my meaning.)
As my children begin their college years, I want them to take advantage of everything this time in their life has to offer. It’s not just about getting your money’s worth – although that’s an important lesson – whether you are paying tuition or your kids are taking out loans. This is the time to take risks. Try new things. Meet new people. Step out of your comfort zone.
There are many things I wish I had done during my college years (and maybe a few I wish I had not done!). I wish I had developed more of a relationship with teachers and sought their advice. I also wish I had taken more advantage of clubs, school organizations, and service work, but I let self-doubt and fear prevent me from taking those risks.
Don’t get me wrong, I am very happy with my life. I had a wonderful college experience. Hindsight is 20/20. Things happen for a reason, but I don’t want my kids to have regrets about not taking chances. Four years (or maybe five or six!) go by very quickly. It’s a great time of life to discover who you are, find friends with different opinions and passions, and transition from child to adult. So, as my second son begins this new phase, I’ve consulted the highest authorities – nostalgic parents, friends, and recent college graduates to offer their words of wisdom. Will he listen? I honestly don’t know. Maybe, though, these pearls of wisdom will remain in the back of his mind when an opportunity presents itself. And, instead of looking the other way because it might require effort and risk, he might just hear that little voice of mine and decide to go for it.
So, here’s a quick list for college students to consider as they get ready for school. If those of us that have graduated could go back, these are the things we would do differently!
Wish Lists from the "Woulda Coulda Shoulda’s"
1. I wish I had gone to more events...ballgames, rallies, etc.
2. I wish I had served on a student government board.
3. I wish I had spent more time meeting individually with professors to pick their brains. I view it as a missed opportunity.
4. I wish I had done more volunteering.
5. I wish I had joined an Engineering club.
6. Sometimes, I wish I had gone to school out of town.
7. I wish I had taken my undergraduate studies more seriously.
8. I wish I had understood that it wasn't about the points to get a certain grade, but that it should have been about really learning. Graduate school was a rude awakening.
9. I wish I had gone to college with a more open mind and not a specific major.
10. I wish I had switched majors.
11. I wish I had traveled abroad.
12. I wish I had gone to the Bruce Springsteen concert rather than study for an anatomy test. (Okay, I’m not advocating choosing a concert over studying. However, every student needs to take a break once in a while. It’s good to recharge! And, no, this wasn’t me.)
10 Suggestions from current students, teachers and alums:
1. Go to Class!
2. Get out there and enjoy it all. Take it seriously and always do your best.
3. Sign up for a club.
4. Utilize resources available on campus, including services like writing centers and tutoring.
5. Volunteer on campus or at local organizations. Take time to help others.
6. Develop a good relationship with your professors. They can be great mentors. Take advantage of their office hours. You want the people who determine your grades to know your name and that you're working hard. They can also clarify course material, provide guidance on papers, and offer tips on how to prepare for tests.
7. Study abroad for a full year. (If a year is too long for you, consider studying abroad for one semester, the summer, or holiday breaks.)
8. Take computer classes even if they are not required for your major.
9. Get to know the history and traditions of your school.
10. Reach out and meet new people.
What are your suggestions and tips for incoming freshmen and current college students? Did we miss anything? Share your words of wisdom here!
Photo credit: Dolly Duplantier & Delta Upsilon, Global Service Initiative Trip

isn't as bitter as last year, we’ve still got a long way to go with no end in sight. And, we are not alone! Even Southern states are dealing with frigid cold temperatures, ice storms, ridiculous wind chills and hazardous driving conditions. The only people enjoying this crazy weather are the students receiving snow days. The cold days and grey skies take their toll. It’s not easy to be bright and cheery when you’re covered head to toe in fleece, wool and long underwear. It’s just really hard to be nice when you can’t feel your toes.
kindness and pass it on to others. Their goals are to:
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “
Many volunteers will use MLK Day to help elementary schools. Las January, students at 

If your student is always on the go and the thought of being home for four to five weeks will drive you both crazy, then consider a service trip to round out the winter break.
The organization provides three simple meals, basic accommodations, and basic logistics to ensure a positive and productive experience. Volunteers must cover their own travel expenses and meals on days off. The organization has a strict minimum age policy and cannot accept volunteers under the age of 15 (14 in the Philippines). All 16 and 17 year olds must be accompanied with a responsible adult.
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communities worldwide to reach their full potential by tackling the causes of poverty and injustice. Their
Save the Children
While students are home for break or off for the holidays, a great community service activity is to volunteer at the food depository. School groups, service clubs, and individuals can help repack bulk food products into individual/family sizes. The food depository posts their 
Van Dyke said when he asks students why they want to pursue a specific major; they usually reply that they are good in that subject. For example, a student good in Math wants to study Engineering, but he may not look further than the obvious career path. They don’t think about all the different options for their particular set of skills. Many students just don’t want to do the research.
Allison’s volunteer work at the camp and throughout high school not only confirmed her desire to work in medicine, but also influenced her decision to become a pediatrician. A 2012 graduate of
“Every year, since before I can remember, my mom brought me to help her at Krewe de Camp. When I was 8 years old, I met a girl named Katie who had Cerebral Palsy. She couldn't use her voice to speak so she used sign language. As soon as camp was over I asked my mom for some sign language books and dictionaries so I could learn how to communicate with Katie for the next summer. I can trace back my decision to go to RIT for interpreting to that day. I loved the feeling of being able to communicate with someone through a visual language and I wanted to be able to facilitate communication between people like Katie and other people who don't know her language.”
Walker thinks it’s never too soon to begin student volunteering in the community. “It can provide an easy and free way for students to get an idea about their potential career path.”
While extracurricular activities and leadership skills have always been a part of the admissions process, universities are now looking more closely at an applicant’s community engagement and student volunteering record. However, before your high schooler starts racking up miscellaneous hours for some magical number, keep in mind that today’s college admissions counselors aren’t just looking for quantitative data. They want to know why your student is doing service work.
Tydlaska adds that whatever type of student volunteering is chosen, it should be authentic. “If it’s not authentic, don’t pursue it. If your passion is sports, writing, music, etc. - pursue your talent in those areas.”



